Short Hair

Diana came home with a new book last Saturday. Although we both are avid readers, she and I have totally different reading habits. I will have two or three books scattered around the house which I read at the same time, picking up where I left off the last time with no problem. But if Diana starts a book, she will not put it down until she finishes it – usually some time the next morning. Many is the time I have gotten up at 4:00am to see her still sitting on the couch, bleary-eyed, reading the book she started the night before. Oh, and before she starts the book, she reads the last few pages.

“Why do you have to read the ending first?”
“I want to make sure it has a happy ending.”
“And if it doesn’t?”
“Then I won’t read the book.”
“But doesn’t that ruin the story for you?”
“No. They’re romance novels. They all have happy endings.”
“Then why read the end?”
“Just to make sure.”

The important thing is that when she has found a good book, she’s happy. And when Diana is happy, I’m happy. She settled in to start reading while I watched some documentary on Medieval Europe. After awhile, I got up to get a drink. She was several chapters in at this point.

“You want anything?”
“A Diet Coke would be great.”
“How’s the book?”
“It’s good.”
“So is the guy a Scotsman or a British Lord?”
“Neither. He’s a GHOST!”
“No, not really. She thought he was a ghost, but it turned out he was a pirate.”
“Of course.”
“Well, not a pirate. A smuggler.”
“That’s almost a pirate. Does she hate him?”
“She’s afraid of him, but her heart isn’t sure.”
“I think he’s the one.”
“I do too. He’s on a secret mission so he can get a pardon and not be hung for smuggling.”
“So… he’s kind of a spy.”
“Kind of.”
“A ghost-pirate-spy? Holy hell, you just hit the Sexy Trifecta.”

Some time later, I decided to head to bed, knowing I’d most likely see Diana sitting in the exact same place reading when I got up the next morning. As I went to kiss her goodnight, I glanced at the cover of the book.

“Goodnight, Darling.”
“So… when you’re reading those, are you picturing me as the hero?”
“Ummm…. sure.”
“You kinda hesitated there.”
“Well…. uhhh… you have short hair.”
“I have short a lot of things.”
“Theirs is always long.”
“Oh, I’m sure it is.”
“I meant their hair.”
“Uh huh.”

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